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Back-to-School in Florida: A Family Therapist's Perspective

Updated: Oct 30


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As a working mom of three young kids, I was looking forward to the start of the new school year. After a summer full of the “working parent shuffle” with camps, shorter work windows and logistical gymnastics, I was craving structure and routine for our family. I thought: Back to school will bring a rhythm to our family. We’ll hit our groove again! But as parenting often goes, life had other plans. We missed our long-awaited meet-the-teacher day because my middle child got sick. Then, on the second day of school, my oldest child woke up with a 102°F fever. We've had 3 different illnesses since the start of the school year. But now that we've been back in session for over a month, we are finally hitting our groove.


I know I’m not alone in the bumpy start to the school year. I work with many parents in my private practice as a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. Back-to-school season is full of promise and excitement—but it also comes with challenges, especially in those early weeks. Below, I’m outlining a few common challenges you might encounter, and I share some visual tools and emotion regulation strategies that I’m using with my own 4- and 6-year-olds to help ease the transition.


3 Common Back-to-School Stressors (and What to Do About Them)


1. Illness 

Whenever groups of children come together, so do germs. On average, school-aged children get 6 to 10 viral infections per year. Even if your child loves school, their immune system might need time to catch up.

What you can do:

  • Anticipate illness and have the illness essentials on hand (medicine, crackers, popsicles).

  • Have a conversation with your spouse and a plan for who will take off of work when illness strikes and set expectations. This can prevent resentment if one person is "always the one to re-arrange their work schedule."

  • Illness triggers anxiety for me (Yup, like many clients I work with, I like to be in control). In situations I can't control, I practice radical acceptance. There isn’t anything I can do to change it, so I try to adopt some positive/healthy coping cognitions:

    • “I can handle stress.”

    • “Missing work to take care of my child is reasonable.”

    • “I can’t always control what happens, but I can control how I respond.”


2. Restraint Collapse

Restraint collapse refers to the emotional “meltdown” that happens when kids let go after a full day of holding it together. At school, they’ve been following rules, managing impulses, focusing on work, navigating social situations—often without expressing how they really feel. Home is their safe space, so it’s also where the emotions tend to pour out.

What restraint collapse might look like in your child:

  • Irritability

  • Whining or clinging

  • Crying spells

  • Refusal to talk

  • Seeming withdrawn or “on edge”

How to support your child:

  • Offer calm connection, not questions or correction.

    • “Looks like you’ve had a really big day. I’m here.”

  • Allow decompression time before jumping into homework or chores (My kiddos like to swing and play in our sand pit).

  • Create after-school rituals: snack, quiet time, movement, or play.

  • Help label their feelings without trying to fix everything: You can reference my How are You Feeling Chart below


  • Acknowledge that they’re not giving you a hard time—they’re having a hard time. Try not to take your child’s emotions personally. 

  • Help your child engage in some healthy emotion regulation: You can reference my Emotion Regulation Strategies below


3. Difficulty with Transitions:

Transitions are challenging and take time. For some families, Summer might have meant slow or later mornings and fewer demands. Shifting into early alarms, packed lunches, and rigid schedules is a big change, especially for sensitive or younger children.

What helps:

  • Predictable routines (Check out my Visual Schedules for Morning and Evening below)

  • Empathy & compassion for the adjustment—You are holding a lot of space for your kids so make sure you give yourself grace too

  • Building in downtime after school and on weekends

  • Lowering expectations at first

  • Adopting confidence that you and your child will get into a rhythm and adjust


Conversations with Co-parents

Another back-to-school conversation that is useful involves checking in with your co-parent. If you all are living together, it’s a good time to discuss who is doing what: drop off, pick up, dinner prep, homework help, reading school emails. I see a lot of resentment build up with couples when the “load” doesn’t feel fair. This is a conversation that should happen often, and I often recommend weekly check-ins with couples who are also parents.


Free, Printable Tools I’m Using with my Children:

To help my 4- and 6-year-olds feel more settled and in control, I created simple handouts and visual aids. These can foster independence, help reduce power struggles and support healthy emotional regulation.

Included PDFs:

  • Morning Routine Checklist (below)

  • Afternoon & Evening Routine Checklist (below)


  • Emotion Regulation Strategies

  • "How are you Feeling" Visual Chart


Final Thoughts

If you are struggling with some of the typical back-to-school challenges, you aren’t alone. Even though I am a Marriage and Family Therapist who specializes in supporting young parents, I also experience the same challenges as the families I work with in my practice. The good news it that the start of school doesn’t have to be picture-perfect to be meaningful, and it is never too late to adopt some strategies to help your family get into a better groove.


I’m cheering you on!


Take care,

Dr. Jenna Scott




 
 
 

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